Kind Treatment
of Parents and Upholding of Ties of Kinship.
By
Imam Nawawi
In
the name of Allāh, the Most Gracious, the Most Merciful;
All
the praise and Thanks is due to Allāh, the Lord of al-‘ālameen. I testify that
there is none worthy of worship except Allāh, and that Muhammad, Sallallāhu
‘alayhi wasallam, is His Messenger
Allah,
the Exalted, says:
· "Worship
Allah and join none with Him (in worship); and do good to parents, kinsfolk,
orphans, Al-Masakin (the poor), the neighbour who is near of kin, the neighbour
who is a stranger, the companion by your side, the wayfarer (you meet), and
those (slaves) whom your right hands possess". [Al-Nisā’ 4:36]
· "And fear Allah
through Whom you demand (your mutual rights), and (do not cut the relations of)
the wombs (kinship)". [Al-Nisā’ 4:1]
· "And those who join
that which Allah has commanded to be joined (i.e., they are good to their
relatives and do not sever the bond of kinship)".
[Al-Ra’d 13:21]
· "And we have enjoined
on man to be good and dutiful to his parents".
[Al-Ankabut, 29:8]
· "And your Rabb has
decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents.
If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a
word of disrespect, nor shout at them but address them in terms of honour. And
lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: 'My
Rubb! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young".
[Al-Isrā’,17:23,24]
· "And We have enjoined
on man (to be dutiful and good) to his parents. His mother bore him in weakness
and hardship upon weakness and hardship, and his weaning is in two years- give
thanks to Me and to your parents". [Luqman 31:14]
312.
'Abdullah bin Mas'ud (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: I
asked the Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam), “Which of the deeds is loved most by Allah?” The Messenger of Allah
(Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said: “Solat
at its proper time.” I asked, “'What next?” He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)
replied, “Kindness to parents.” I
asked, “'What next?” He replied, “'Jihad
in the way of Allah.” [Recorded
by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
Performance of Salat at the stated time means its performance in earliest
prescribed or at least its regularity. One should not give preference to
mundane affairs over it. Solat and Jihad are the two most meritorious duties of
a Muslim. When nice treatment to parents is mentioned along with Solat and
Jihad, it gives further importance to this injunction.
313.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "No son can repay (the kindness shown by his father)
unless he finds him a slave and buys him and emancipates him". [Recorded
by Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith also brings out the eminence of parents and outstanding importance
of their rights.
314.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "He who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let him
be hospitable to his guest; and he who believes in Allah and the Last Day, let
him maintain good the ties of blood relationship; and he who believes in Allah
and the Last Day, must speak good or remain silent". [Recorded
by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith is mentioned here to highlight the importance of kindness to
relatives. It enjoins considerate treatment to relatives and stresses that one
should maintain relationship with them at all costs. So much so that even if
they misbehave and sever relations with him, one should make efforts to restore
not only relationship with them but also their rights. This is what kindness to
relatives really means. Islam has laid great stress on it. Relatives include
both paternal and maternal relatives.
315.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported, the Messenger
of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said: "Allah created all the
creatures and when He finished the task of His creation, Ar-Rahm (ties of relationship) said: '(O Allah) at this place I
seek refuge with You against severing my ties.' Allah said: 'That I treat with kindness those who treat
you with kindness and sever ties with those who sever ties with you.' Ar-Rahm said: 'I am satisfied.' Allah
said: 'Then this is yours".
Then Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Recite this
Ayah if you like: 'Would you then, if
you were given the authority, do mischief in the land, and sever your ties of
kinship? Such are they whom Allah has cursed, so that He has made them deaf and
blinded their sight". (Muhammad 47:22, 23). [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
In
another narration Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Allah
(SWT) says: 'He who maintains good ties with you, I maintain good ties with
him; and he who severs your ties, I sever ties with him". [Recorded
by Al-Bukhari]
Commentary:
This Hadith also stresses the importance of proper treatment with relatives for
the reason that this is a special means of attaining the nearness and Mercy of
Allah. A conduct contrary to it, that is to say, devouring the rights of
relatives and continuation of estrangement with them, is the cause of
displeasure and Wrath of Allah.
316.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: A person
came to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) and asked, "Who
among people is most deserving of my fine treatment?" He (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Your mother". He again asked, ''Who
next?" "Your mother", the Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)
replied again. He asked, "Who next?" He (the Prophet (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam)) said again, "Your mother." He again asked,
"Then who?" Thereupon he (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said,"
Then your father."
In
another narration: "O Messenger of Allah! Who
is most deserving of my fine treatment?" He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)
said, "Your mother, then your mother, then your mother, then your father,
then your nearest, then nearest". [Recorded
by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith tells us that the rights of the mother are three times more important
than that of the father for the reasons that:
1)
She is weaker than the father.
2.
The following three troubles are borne exclusively by the mother while the
father does not share them with her:
a)
She carries the baby in her womb for nine months,
b)
The labor pain which she suffers.
c)
Two years' period of suckling which disturbs her sleep at night and affects her
health? She has also to be very cautious in her food for the welfare of the
baby.
317.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "May
he be disgraced! May he be disgraced! May he be disgraced, whose parents, one
or both, attain old age during his life time, and he does not enter Jannah (by
rendering being dutiful to them)". [Recorded by Muslim].
Commentary:
The word ''Ragham" means soil. When a person's nose is soiled, it is a
mark of his extreme humiliation. This metaphor carries a curse for an
unfortunate person who does not win the pleasure of Allah by serving and
obeying his parents. In fact, it is a malediction as well as a prediction of
someone's inauspicious end. Service of parents is essential at every stage of
their life - whether they are young or old. But this Hadith mentions their old
age for the reason that in that period of their life they stand in greater need
of care and service. It is a very callous offense to leave them at the mercy of
circumstances when they are old, senile and depend on others for their needs.
To neglect them at that stage is a major sin for which one deserves Hell-fire.
318.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: A man said to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) : "I have relatives with whom I try to keep the ties of
relationship but they sever relations with me; and whom I treat kindly but they
treat me badly, I am gentle with them but they are rough to me." Rasulullah
(Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) replied, "If you are as you say, it is as if
you are feeding them hot ashes, and you will be with a supporter against them
from Allah as long as you continue to do so". [Recorded by Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith has three important lessons:
First,
the misbehavior of one's relative is no justification for the misbehavior of
another, let alone the severing of relations on that account.
Second,
the person who treats his relatives nicely in all events and circumstances is
blessed by Allah Who will send from heaven helpers to support him.
Third,
the consequence of denying compassion and kindness to relatives is as woeful as
the eating of hot ashes.
319.
Anas bin Malik(radiyallahu’anhu) reported: Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said,
"He who desires ample provisions and his life be prolonged, should
maintain good ties with his blood relations". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
Commentary:
One, who is benevolent and compassionate towards one's own relatives, stands to
gain at least two definite advantages in this world besides the reward in the
next. These two advantages are the increase in his subsistence and longevity of
life.
Increase
in subsistence means that Almighty Allah will increase the quantity of his
worldly goods or his means of subsistence will be blessed by Him. Similar is
the case of longevity of life. The life of such person is either actually
increased (in terms of years) or his life is graced with the Blessings of
Allah. Both interpretations are correct.
320.
Abu Hamzah Anas bin Malik (radiyallahu’anhu)
reported: Abu Talhah (radiyallahu’anhu) was the
richest among the Ansar of Al-Madinah and possessed the largest property; and
among his possessions what he loved most was his garden known as Bairuha' which
was opposite the mosque, and Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) often visited it and drank from its fresh
water. When this ayah was revealed: "By
no means shall you attain Al-Birr (piety, righteousness - here it means Allah's
reward, i.e., Jannah), unless you spend (in Allah's Cause) of that which you
love," (Ali- ‘Imran 3:92). Abu Talhah came to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) , and said: "Allah says in His Book: 'By no means shall
you attain Al-Birr, unless you spend (in Allah's Cause) of that which you
love,' and the dearest of my property is Bairuha' so I have given it as Sadaqah
(charity) for Allah's sake, and I anticipate its reward with Him; so spend it,
O Messenger of Allah, as Allah guides you". Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Well-done!
That is profitable property. I have heard what you have said, but I think you
should spend it on your nearest relatives." So Abu Talhah distributed
it among his nearest relatives and cousins. [Recorded by Al-Bukhari and
Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith has already been mentioned in the chapter which deals with the
merits of spending of what one loves best in the way of Allah. It has been
repeated here in support of benevolence to the relatives. Its repetition makes
it clear that while spending in the way of Allah, one should always first of
all consider his relatives and help those of them who deserve assistance. After
fulfilling their needs, if anything remains then it can be given to others.
321.
'Abdullah bin 'Amr bin Al-'as (radiyallahu’anhum) reported: A man (boy) came to the Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) of Allah and said, "I
swear allegiance to you for emigration and Jihad, seeking reward from
Allah." He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Is any of your parents alive?" He said, "Yes, both
of them are alive." He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) then asked, "Do you want to seek reward from
Allah?" He replied in the affirmative. Thereupon Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "Go back to
your parents and keep good company with them". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
In
another narration it is reported: A person (boy) came to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) and sought his permission to participate in Jihad. The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) asked, "Are your parents alive?" He
replied in the affirmative. The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "(You should) consider their service
as Jihad."
Commentary:
Under normal circumstances, Jihad is Fard Kifayah (collective duty -- which
means that if some people observe it, the rest of the Muslims will be exempted
from its obligation). In such circumstances permission of parents to
participate in Jihad is necessary because their service is Fard-ul-'ain
(individual duty -- an injunction or ordinance, the obligation of which extends
to every Muslim in person), and the former cannot be preferred to the latter.
This Hadith explains such a situation. In certain circumstances, however, Jihad
becomes Fard-ul-'ain and in that case permission of the parents to take part in
Jihad is not essential because then every Muslim is duty-bound to take part in
it.
322.
'Abdullah bin 'Amr Al-'as (radiyallahu’anhum) reported: The Prophet (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) said, "The person who
perfectly maintains the ties of kinship is not the one who does it because he
gets recompensed by his relatives (for being kind and good to them), but the
one who truly maintains the bonds of kinship is the one who persists in doing
so even though the latter has severed the ties of kinship with him".
[Recorded by Al-Bukhari].
Commentary:
This Hadith makes clear the essentials of kindness to relatives. Those kinsmen,
who respect and honour you, would obviously be treated by you fairly. It goes
without saying that people usually reciprocate sentiments showed to them. But
this is not maintaining the ties of kinship but kindness for kindness. On the
opposite side, there is a kinsman who is rough and rude and is always bent upon
severing relation with you, but you tolerate his excesses with patience and
perseverance, return his harshness with politeness, maintain relationship with
him in spite of all his efforts to break it, then what you are exercising is
maintaining the ties of kinship. This is what Islam actually demands from a
Muslim. But this is the excellence of Faith which one must try to attain. There
is nothing remarkable in exchanging dry smiles.
323.
'Aishah (radiyallahu’anha) reported: Messenger of
Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "The bond of relationship is
suspending from the Throne, and says: 'He who keeps good relations with me,
Allah will keep connection with him, but whosoever severs relations with me,
Allah will sever connection with him".[ Recorded by Al-Bukhari and
Muslim].
Commentary:
The discourse on compassion to relatives mentioned in this Hadith is not
impossible because Almighty Allah is Omnipotent and is thus capable of doing
what He likes. He can create perception, consciousness and power of speech in
everything. An instance of it has already been mentioned in a Hadith quoted
earlier.
324.
It has been narrated that Maimunah bint Al-Harith (radiyallahu’anha) had set
free a slave-girl without the Prophet's permission. When her turn came (the
Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) used to visit his wives in turns), she
made mention of that to him saying, "Did you know I have set slave-girl
free?" He said, "Have you, indeed?" She replied,
"Yes". He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) then remarked, "Had you given
her to your maternal uncles, you would have your reward increased".
[Recorded by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith brings out the following two points:
1)
A woman is free to spend anything of her own property without the permission of
her husband, but not of things owned by her husband.
2)
To spend on the needy relatives is more meritorious than to set a slave free
because to set a slave free is a Sadaqah (charity) only, while paying Sadaqah
to a kinsman has a double merit as it carries the reward of Sadaqah as well as
"maintaining the ties of kinship."
325.
Asma' bint Abu Bakr As-Siddiq (radiyallahu’anha) said: My mother came to me while she was still a polytheist, so
I asked Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam), "My mother, who
is ill-disposed to Islam, has come to visit me. Shall I maintain relations with
her?" He (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) replied, "Yes, maintain relations with your mother". [Recorded
by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
The woman mentioned in this Hadith had come from Makkah to Al-Madinah. What
this Hadith signifies is that it is essential to be kind to parents even if
they are Mushrikun (polytheists) and Kuffar (disbelievers). This has also been
clearly ordained in the Noble Qur'an: ''... but behave with them in the world kindly".
(Luqman 31:15).
326.
Zainab Ath-Thaqafiyah (radiyallahu’anha) the wife of 'Abdullah bin Mas'ud (radiyallahu’anhu)
reported: When Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) told the women
that they should give Sadaqah (charity), even if it should be some of their
jewellery, I returned to 'Abdullah bin Mas'ud and said, "You are a man who
does not possess much, and Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) has
commanded us to give Sadaqah. So go and ask him if giving to you will serve the
purpose; otherwise, I shall give it to someone else." He asked me that I
should better go myself. I went and found a woman of the Ansar at the door of
Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam), waiting to ask a similar
question as mine. The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) was endowed with
dignity, and so we could not go in. When Bilal (radiyallahu’anhu) came out to
us, we said to him: "Go to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)
and tell him that there are two women at the door who have come to ask him
whether it will serve them to give Sadaqah to their husbands and to orphans who
are in their charge, but do not tell him who we are. Bilal (radiyallahu’anhu) went
in and asked him, and Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) asked
him who the women were. When he told him that they were a woman of the Ansar
and Zainab, he asked him which Zainab it was, and when he was told it was the
wife of 'Abdullah bin Mas'ud, Rasulullah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said, "They will have a double reward, one for maintaining
the ties of kinship and another for Sadaqah". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
Commentary:
1.
We learn from this Hadith that a woman can also give Sadaqah and Zakat to her
husband, provided he is poor. But its opposite is not permissible. That is to
say, a husband cannot pay Zakat to his wife because he is responsible for her
maintenance while wife is not obliged to do it for her husband. So, the principle
deduced from it is that one who is bound to pay Zakat under the Shari'ah is not
permitted to pay it to his dependents.
2.
In case of need, a woman can go out of her house subject to the condition that
she observes the restriction of the veil prescribed by the Shari'ah in this
behalf.
3)
Like men, women should also take keen interest in religious matters. They
should not feel shy of doing it.
327.
Abu Sufyan Sakhr bin Harb (radiyallahu’anhu) mentioned Heraclius in a long
Hadith and said: Heraclius asked me, "What
does this Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) teach you?" I said,
"He orders us to worship Allah Alone and not to associate a thing with Him
in worship, to discard what our ancestors said, to perform the Solat (prayer),
speak the truth, and maintain the ties of kinship". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
Commentary:
Besides Tawhid (Oneness of Allah), this Hadith enjoins punctuality in Salat and
excellence of character. In all the forms of worship, Salat is the most
important, and the best in the nobility of character is righteousness. After
professing faith in Tauhid and belief that Muhammad (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) is the last Prophet of Allah, a Muslim should be punctual in Salat
and make himself a model of excellent character.
328.
Abu Dharr (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) said, "You will soon conquer a land
where people deal with Qirat."
And
according to another version: Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) said,
"You will soon conquer Egypt where Al-Qirat is
frequently mentioned. So when you conquer it, treat its inhabitants well. For
there lies upon you the responsibility because of blood ties or relationship
(with them)".
[Recorded
by Muslim].
Commentary:
In this Hadith, the Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) has urged his Companions to treat the
Egyptians nicely for the reason of maintaining the ties of kinship and for the
fact that Egypt was the country of his in-laws (Mariyah, the mother of Ibrahim,
and one of the Prophet's wives was from that place). This is why this Hadith
has been included in the present chapter which deals with the subject of
maintaining the ties of kinship. This Hadith is also a Prophecy of the Prophet (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) due to the fact that the prophecy he had made came true. A
short time after his death, Egypt became part of the Muslim empire.
329.
Abu Hurairah (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: When this Verse was revealed: "And warn
your tribe (O Muhammad (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)) of near kindred". (26:214) Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) called the Quraish; when they gathered, he said to them: "O sons
of 'Abd Shams; O sons of Ka'b bin Lu'ai, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O
sons of Murrah bin Ka'b, rescue yourselves from the Fire! O sons of 'Abd Manaf,
rescue yourselves from the Fire! O sons of 'Abdul-Muttalib, rescue yourselves
from the Fire! O Fatimah, rescue yourself from the Fire, for I have no power
(to protect you) from Allah in anything except that I would sustain
relationship with you". [Recorded by Muslim].
Commentary:
1.
This Hadith tells us that lineage in the Hereafter will not help anybody. So
much so that even one's relationship with Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) shall not carry any weight on that day. The only thing that
will then help in salvation will be one's good deeds. People for whom the
Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) and pious men will intercede will be
believers with some sins in their account and not the disbelievers devoid of
Faith and good actions. Neither will anybody intercede for the infidels, nor
will the infidels find salvation.
2.
In preaching religion, priority must be given to one's own close relatives.
They deserve it more than anyone else and for these reason Divine injunctions
should be first of all conveyed to them.
3.
Even if a Muslim's relatives are pagans and polytheists, their rights of
kinsmen and the demands of "maintaining the ties of kinship" enjoined
by Islam must be fulfilled. The first and foremost demand of their rights is
that they should be invited to the right path so that they will be saved from
Hell-fire.
330.
Abu Abdullah 'Amr bin Al-'as (radiyallahu’anhu) said: I heard Messenger of
Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) saying openly not secretly, "The
family of so-and-so (i.e., Abu Talib) are not my supporters. My supporter is
Allah and the righteous believing people. But they (that family) have kinship
(Rahm) with whom I will maintain good the ties of kinship". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari
and Muslim].
Commentary:
Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) had made it absolutely clear that although
such persons were his near relatives, he did not have any affection and
friendship with them because there cannot be any affection between a pagan and
a Muslim. Friendship and affection can only be for Allah and those who have
faith in Him. One can accommodate the non-Muslim relatives to the extent
permitted by "maintaining the ties of kinship", provided they are not
at war with the Muslims.
331.
Abu Ayyub Khalid bin Zaid Al-Ansari (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: A man came to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) and said, "Direct me to a deed which will admit me to Jannah and
take me away from the Fire". The Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) said, "Worship Allah and
associate no partner with Him, perform As-Salat, pay Zakat, and maintain the
ties of kinship". [Recorded by Al-Bukhari and Muslim].
Commentary:
This Hadith indicates the actions which constitute the means to attain Jannah
and salvation from Hell. Thus, it makes evident that Jannah cannot be achieved
by wishful thinking. One cannot get it without Faith and good deeds. In the
absence of these two factors, intercession of any person will be of no avail.
332.
Salman bin 'Amir (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: The Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam)
said, "When you breakfast, you should do it with a date-fruit for there is
blessing in it, and if you do not find a date-fruit, break it with water for it
is pure." Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) added:
"Charity towards a poor person is charity, and towards a relation is both
charity and maintaining the ties (of kinship)". [Recorded by Tirmidzi].
Commentary:
We learn two points from this Hadith:
Firstly,
it is more rewarding to break the fast with date-fruit or water. Secondly,
payment of Sadaqah to one's poor relatives carries a double reward.
333.
Abdullah Ibn 'Umar (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: I had a wife whom I loved but 'Umar (radiyallahu’anhu)
disliked her. He asked me to divorce her and when I refused, 'Umar Al-Khattab (radiyallahu’anhu)
went to Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) and mentioned the
matter to him. Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu ‘alayhi wasallam) asked me to
divorce her. [Recorded by At-Tirmidzi and Abu Dawud].
Commentary:
If parents' order to divorce one's wife is based on the principles of Shari'ah
and morality, it must be obeyed, as is evident from this Hadith. If their order
is founded on other factors, then one should try to convince them politely so
that they agree with one's view on the issue. Here Ibn 'Umar (radiyallahu’anhu)
loved his wife for love's sake, but his father 'Umar bin Khattab (radiyallahu’anhu)
disliked her basing his decision on religious grounds. This is why the Prophet (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) ordered Ibn 'Umar to obey his father.
334.
Abud-Darda' (radiyallahu’anhu) reported: A man came to me and said, “I have a wife whom my mother
commands me to divorce”. I replied him that I had heard Messenger of Allah (Sallallahu
‘alayhi wasallam) saying, “A parent is the best of the gates of Jannah; so if
you wish, keep to the gate, or lose it.” [Recorded by At-Tirmidzi and Ibn Majah].
Commentary:
The word "Walid," applies to mother as well as father. As the word
"Walidain" is a dual form and covers mother and father both; similarly
the noun "father", also applies to both. This Hadith also stresses
that obedience of parents and submission to their order must have preference
over the love for the wife as long as this order of theirs is fair and just.
335.
Al-Bara' bin 'Azib (radiyallahu’anhum) reported: I heard the Prophet (Sallallahu ‘alayhi
wasallam) saying: “A mother's sister is equivalent to (real) mother (in status)”.
[Recorded by At-Tirmidzi]
Commentary:
This Hadith tells us that one should be as respectful to one's aunt (mother's
real sister) as one is to mother, as it is a virtue as well as "a form of
maintaining the ties of kinship".
And
Allāh Almighty Knows best.
[Excerpted
from “The
Book Of Kind Treatment Of Parents And Establishment Of Ties Of Blood Relationship;
Chapter # 40, Riyad-Us-Saliheen” Compiled By Al-Imam Abu Zakariya
Yahya bin Sharaf An-Nawawi Ad-Dimashqi (rahimahullāh) Via Guided Ways]
